how did I know it would go down like this

It's not unexpected that this is where I am. Certain things ended up up-ended, and that's what you might predict if you were a social scientist laying down odds.

 It's a big book that never gets written but I read it over and over in swathes stored in little corners of my mind. It's on somebody's bestseller list even though most critics find it risible. You can't laugh this kind of story to the bank, though. You can't write yourself out of it, either, if that's what's stopping you from leaving off.

Fading in the text, probably accompanied by a very softly played soundtrack by Modest Mouse. Something like that, anyway, seems right for a clumsily killer thought, a dumb, aborted post.